Hey, it has been awhile again. So some big shifts have been happening in the past two weeks with dumping expectations, it has been freeing me to explore new things. Open myself to being, as is, where is. Embracing the moment. I am less and less driven to be perfect, appear a certain way and just really enjoying things as they come…
I leave in two days…yeah holy shit 60 days went by, in a flash, dragging slow at times. I am procrastinating packing up, realizing how many things I brought that I did not even take out of bag or box…but a guy never knows right? Going to be on the midnight ferry back to rupert…seems fitting to leave the way I came. The storms have been crazy wild this week, winds out of nowhere, thudding against the walls, reminding me instantly how much power and intent Mother nature has. Take it seriously!
I have been out connecting more lately, in nature, in forests so old and dense and rich with oxygen and life that as my friend Shelly would say “blood cells instantly become round and healthy”. When I am walking in nature, I can feel myself rooting into the certainty of the man I am destined to be. The forest floors are carpeted with ancient cedars that are returning to earth what they took and moss so green and rich with color, I curse man for not inventing a camera that can capture the diversity of colors and texture. When I am there, I want to lay down on this earth and become it so completely…fully.I came out here with so many expectstions of myself, things I had to try and do, in a vane thought that it would push me into life. For the first month, I suffered at my own doing as I came to realize that again I had set expectations for me and was now letting me down. It was amazing how much I started appreciating myself and this majestic land when I let it go.
On one of my walks, I was on the beech and noticed this piece of driftwood. There was nothing visually appealing about it, just another piece of wood in the millions that come up on shore. I knew though that I had to take this piece back to my cabin and I carried it there. I laid it on the tailgate and put chisel to wood and the true form emerged from it….what you see in this photo, was always beneath the smooth exterior surface…by divine design of God it was there and I was the one who’s hands were used to reveal the beauy within The experience was transcendent as I “listened” to what was spoken energetically. After drying the creature inside for a couple of weeks, She spoke to me again the other day and I allowed God to work through my hands again to expose her textured skin.
We are like this piece of wood. Created by God with our designs already laid out within, we enter earth, drift at sea until picked up by someone who resonates with us, carries us to their work space and through each personal experience, chisels away the external to find the divine design that God intended. Sometimes we will have several artists who work on us at once or seperately over the course of life, until God’s design is revealed. In this way we are “Carved”.
She is named in Honour of Haida Gwaii. Her name is HaidaSaurus. She is of God, fierce and fearless….may we all become “carved” someday.
January 26, 2016